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Funny Stuff

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Comments

  • federicafederica Seeker of the clear blue sky... Its better to remain silent and be thought a fool, than to speak out and remove all doubt Moderator

    And if you chase the damn things, whatcha gonna do if you catch one?!?

  • JeroenJeroen Luminous beings are we, not this crude matter Netherlands Veteran

    Shoshin1JeffreypersonLionduck
  • JeffreyJeffrey Veteran

    Someone told me a funny New Year's resolution:

    I vow to procrastinate more in the 2024. But I won't get started until next week..

    Shoshin1VastmindDagobahZenlobster
  • JeroenJeroen Luminous beings are we, not this crude matter Netherlands Veteran

    KotishkaShoshin1LionduckDagobahZen
  • personDagobahZen
  • KotishkaDagobahZenlobsterLionduck
  • Shoshin1Shoshin1 Veteran
    edited February 14

    LionduckDagobahZenfedericamarcitko
  • In the Galapagos
    A tortoise but no hare
    In the Galapagos
    There is no bear there
    He made a left turn at Cleveland

  • Shoshin1Shoshin1 Veteran

    DagobahZenSteve_B
  • Shoshin1Shoshin1 Veteran

    JeroenDagobahZenKotishka
  • Shoshin1Shoshin1 Veteran

    lobsterVastmindJeffreyfederica
  • Shoshin1Shoshin1 Veteran

    Jeffrey
  • Shoshin1Shoshin1 Veteran

    Vastmindfederica
  • Shoshin1Shoshin1 Veteran

    lobsterKotishka
  • Shoshin1Shoshin1 Veteran

  • lobsterlobster Veteran

    and to welcome @federica back ...

    • An Oxford comma walks into a bar where it spends the evening watching the television, getting drunk, and smoking cigars.

    • A dangling participle walks into a bar. Enjoying a cocktail and chatting with the bartender, the evening passes pleasantly.

    • A bar was walked into by the passive voice.

    • An oxymoron walked into a bar, and the silence was deafening.

    • Two quotation marks walk into a “bar.”

    • A malapropism walks into a bar, looking for all intensive purposes like a wolf in cheap clothing, muttering epitaphs and casting dispersions on his magnificent other, who takes him for granite.

    • Hyperbole totally rips into this insane bar and absolutely destroys everything.

    • A question mark walks into a bar?

    • A non sequitur walks into a bar. In a strong wind, even turkeys can fly.

    • Papyrus and Comic Sans walk into a bar. The bartender says, "Get out -- we don't serve your type."

    • A mixed metaphor walks into a bar, seeing the handwriting on the wall but hoping to nip it in the bud.

    • A comma splice walks into a bar, it has a drink and then leaves.

    • Three intransitive verbs walk into a bar. They sit. They converse. They depart.

    • A synonym strolls into a tavern.

    • At the end of the day, a cliché walks into a bar -- fresh as a daisy, cute as a button, and sharp as a tack.

    • A run-on sentence walks into a bar it starts flirting. With a cute little sentence fragment.

    • Falling slowly, softly falling, the chiasmus collapses to the bar floor.

    • A figure of speech literally walks into a bar and ends up getting figuratively hammered.

    • An allusion walks into a bar, despite the fact that alcohol is its Achilles heel.

    • The subjunctive would have walked into a bar, had it only known.

    • A misplaced modifier walks into a bar owned a man with a glass eye named Ralph.

    • The past, present, and future walked into a bar. It was tense.

    • A dyslexic walks into a bra.

    • A verb walks into a bar, sees a beautiful noun, and suggests they conjugate. The noun declines.

    • A simile walks into a bar, as parched as a desert.

    • A gerund and an infinitive walk into a bar, drinking to forget.

    • A hyphenated word and a non-hyphenated word walk into a bar and the bartender nearly chokes on the irony.

    VastmindJeroenShoshin1
  • federicafederica Seeker of the clear blue sky... Its better to remain silent and be thought a fool, than to speak out and remove all doubt Moderator

    Well blow me down, I came in to post EXACTLY the same joke. How very dare you trump your pedantic, Grammar-Nerdish Moderator! 🤣

    lobsterJeroenVastmind
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